Today marks the 3rd anniversary of the death of my father. Some days it still seems like yesterday. You are told it gets easier with time and yes, the pain seems to be less, but the memories remain... There are days you so long to talk to your love one. My husband has told me in the past how funny it was that my Dad and I could hold a thirty minute conversation about the weather. But we could. We just enjoyed being together. I loved just sitting with him and talking about life.
My Dad spent 20 years in the military and he had so many adventures and saw so many places. I use to think it was a joke that my Dad knew everyone but HE did. We would go places and he would start talking to someone and you would ask "you know him?" oh yes, we served together in such in such or overseas. My Dad knew a lot of history too. He could tell you all kinds of information. He was interesting like that.
There are days I can still hear his voice. Still hear his ol sayings and remember his nicknames for people. I still dream about him and can sometimes still feel his hug and smell his cologne. I am thankful for the memories that are still fresh. I know as time goes by they will begin to fade. It just happens that way and I have to be ok with that.
I know one day I will see my Dad again. I have that hope because I know he is in heaven with so many of my loved ones. You know, it is hard as you get older to loose your family. I am still very young and at times a little envious of those who are much older than me that still have their fathers. So much still to share of life, but yet, it was his time and who I am to question that.
But till then... I will continue on... remembering the good.... trying to learn from the bad. Hopeful and thankful for the time we did have. I will try not to regret the things I wish I had done differently, the mistakes made, the differences we had.
One thing I do know for fact is that my Dad loved me, loved his family. I never once doubted that I was loved and for that I am very, very thankful.
